


The Setup

by nicockla



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Casual Sex, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Luke Hemmings & Calum Hood Friendship, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Oral Sex, Pining, straight - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-20 19:56:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 22,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20681039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nicockla/pseuds/nicockla
Summary: ❝The one where Calum has the best intentions setting Luke and Ashton up except someone should have told Ashton he was being set up and that he's gay❞





	1. Prologue

** _-Luke Hemmings-_ **

"So there's this friend of mine," Calum started, pushing the last of his food around his plate before looking up, "I've been hiding him from you for a while because he was with someone else, but now that he's single I think you'd be great together," 

"Really?" Luke asked astonished through a mouthful of food, he swallowed before continuing, "you've never tried to set me up with anyone before, he must be good."

He shifted a little uncomfortably, "Well, it's not so much a setup, he's still a little down about his ex and I haven't said anything to him about you being single just that you were a good friend of mine and that you and I were having lunch next Wednesday and he should join us," 

"Oh, so we're having lunch next Wednesday are we?" he asked before bringing another forkful to his mouth. 

An exasperated sigh left the other's lips, "Yes, I'm inviting you both to lunch, one of you with the knowledge that the other is single and very much your type and the other knowing nothing like a little helpless fish who needs love," 

"Are you trying to use me to fix your friend?" 

"No, I thought you'd be good together even when he was in a relationship, you've just both never been single at the same time. He's nice and really hot, and he's funny, like not just dumb funny but like witty," 

"He sounds too good to be true," Luke said apprehensively before adding, "you'd want him for yourself if he were that good," 

"He's too white for me, but he'd be perfect for you," Calum responded without skipping a beat. 

Luke sighed, "anyway, what's his name," 

"Ashton Irwin,"


	2. Chapter 2

**-Luke Hemmings-** **  
**

_ **[Wednesday - a week later]** _

Luke rounded the second to last corner to the coffee shop, were they both going to be there waiting? He checked his watch, he was running ten minutes early, maybe there'd be no one there, and he'd be tasked with finding the table, which he hated because when it came to picking inside or outside seating, he always picked wrong. Everyone would turn up, and if they were sitting outside, they'd say 'it's a bit hot out here maybe we should have sat inside', or if he picked inside they'd say it was too loud or that the weather was lovely and they should have sat outside.

He sighed; he was overthinking this. The guy didn't even know it was a setup he wasn't going to be critically analysing everything Luke said or did... he hoped. As he came to the front of the restaurant he could see Calum at a table alone out on the sidewalk, the other tables around him were sparsely filled meaning everyone had relative privacy. Calum saw him and made a big waving motion trying to get his attention and Luke quickly joined him at the square table hoping the embarrassment would stop. 

"Thank god he's not here yet," Luke said with a sigh, pouring himself a glass of water from the jug into the prepared glasses.

"I told you, it's not a setup, setup, just chill out man," Calum rolled his eyes before they locked on something over Luke's shoulder and he began making the wild hand gestures again. "Here he comes, be good,"

He couldn't help but let his mouth drop open in offence when wasn't he good? He turned to look over his shoulder and saw a gorgeous guy waving back at Calum. He had sandy shaggy hair, (a style Luke had always wanted to try for himself) pulled back in a bun, the hair at the nape of his neck had come loose, but he stilled looked tidy. Warm eyes and a big cheesy grin across his face. He really was very good looking, Calum had done well but Luke was still suspicious. If this guy was so great, why didn't he want him for himself? 

"Sorry I got a bit lost," Ashton said flopping down into the chair between the other two, "I know another place, really similar name but like a block and half over,"

"It's fine you're still early," Calum told him with a dismissive shake of his head, "anyway this is my friend Luke, I'm sure I've mentioned him before, but I don't think you guys have ever met." He gestured to Luke, and the tall boy nearly rolled his eyes, who else could he have been talking about?

"You talk about him all the time," he said with an eye roll, "nice to meet you, names Ashton, thought there was something wrong with me cause Calum's never let me meet you. Thought maybe you were his secret boyfriend," he chuckled.

"He must be up to something because he's been very careful not to mention you to me, maybe we're both his secret boyfriends, and he's been hiding it from both of us?" Luke replied with a chuckle.

"Calum do you have something to tell us?" Ashton asked turning to face him with a serious face.

"This, this right here is exactly why you two have never met, I didn't want to be ganged up on," he huffed, but Luke could see the small smile at the corner of his mouth, "wouldn't fuck the either of you if someone paid me by the way," he added faux bitterly at the end.

He was tempted to comment that he'd fuck Ashton and you wouldn't even have to pay him but thought better of it. "Don't be like that you'll hurt my feelings,"

"Yeah I think that's a bit harsh, I am a whole snack," Ashton declared.

_You certainly are_, Luke thought to himself. Jesus Christ, he was so bad today, Calum was right he really did need to behave, a voice broke his thoughts, "Hi, are you ready to order?"

Calum turned to face the waitress now standing behind Ashton, "Our friend only just sat down-"

Ashton interjected, "No it's fine, do you guys have an all-day breakfast?"

"Yeah, we do,"

"I'll have that, and an iced latte thank you,"

"And I'll have an iced latte as well, and, and the Big Newtown burger, please,"

"And you sir?"

"Um, can I have a glass of coke and the lamb salad please,"

"Alright I'll go put that into the kitchen, your drinks will be out soon,"

"So what was I saying?" Ashton asked turning back to face the others,

"That you're a fuckable snack," Luke answered, forcing himself to grin instead of smirk.

Calum sent him a warning look, but Ashton just chuckled, "the fact that you would write off two good looking blokes like us is just crazy, this is why you're single Cal,"

"Oh yeah? Wouldn't be because I'm running around after you two hair bags all the time, would it?"

Ashton blushed sheepishly but Luke rolled his eyes, "I think saying you look after me might be a stretch,"

"So you didn't get locked out of your apartment last week and call me to bring over the spare key?"

This time Luke blushed and became interested in his napkin and Ashton let out a cheerful giggle. Luke couldn't help but bring his head up from its shameful slump and grin at the noise coming out of the other.


	3. Chapter 3

**-Luke Hemmings-** **   
**

** _[Saturday]_ **

"Yeah, he's a friend of Calum's from somewhere," Luke told Michael as they continued up the street weaving through the oncoming crowd of people. 

Michael quickened his pace to keep up with Luke and his long strides, "and we're only just meeting him because Calum's been wanting to set you up with him this whole time?" 

"Well no, it's not a setup, setup he hasn't told him it's a setup," 

"Oh, weird but whatever, why didn't he set me up with him?" Michael nearly collected a short woman as he finished his sentence and apologised quickly before looking back to Luke for an answer. 

He sighed, "he just set you up with that Crystal chick; you need to whoa up mate," 

"I was kidding, she's pretty nice though, and she's insanely hot," Luke just rolled his eyes, "so why do I have to meet him?" 

"I don't know, guess Cal wants all of us to be friends now," he said with a shrug, "Or he knows how good you'll make me look," this earnt him a shove in his side from Michael. 

"You do need all the help you can get. Cal said they're in the Uniqlo up there, game face on buddy," 

"Fuck off," he muttered. 

Calum had invited them all out shopping, saying he needed some 'stuff' and that he wanted company. At first, he'd thought it was just going to be the three of them like usual but when Michael and he had met for breakfast that morning he'd found out Ashton was coming. The blue-haired boy had gone on and on about who on earth it could be that Calum was bringing along and how did he have friends they didn't know about. So Luke had had to fill him in on the whole story as they'd made their way the few blocks between their regular breakfast place and the mall. And now he was broodily following Michael into the store, like a little thunder cloud hoping he and Calum wouldn't embarrass him.

They made their way right down to the back where they found Calum holding a shirt up to himself and Ashton with his hand on his chin thinking very hard. Luke assumed it was probably that he was trying to find a polite way to tell the other it was a dreadful shirt. 

"It's awful cal, makes you look like you're about to pick up your sixteen-year-old girlfriend from school," Luke offered, saving Ashton from having to comment. 

Calum lowered the shirt and shot Luke a dirty look, "you're such a dick sometimes," Luke shrugged. 

"He may be a dick but he's absolutely right, it's bad man," Michael pitched in before turning to Ashton, "Hey Ashton, I'm Michael by the way," he offered his hand. 

Ashton took it with slight uncertainty, "So Calum at least told you about me cause he didn't tell Luke anything," 

"Oh no, I got filled in by Luke on the way here," Michael explained gesturing to Luke beside him. 

Ashton turned to start on Calum, but the younger boy beat him to it, "I knew as soon as I mentioned you they'd think we were dating," 

"That's fair, we probably would have," Michael said honestly, Luke solemnly nodded his agreement. 

"You're gonna give me a complex," Ashton sighed again rolling his eyes. 

Calum hung the shirt back on the rack and turned to Michael, "anyway, I'm now refusing to shop with Luke based on that comment, so Michael can you come down to the Universal with me?"

Wow, nice segway Calum, that wasn't totally awkward and obvious, Luke thought to himself. 

"Yeah, I wanna pick up a new cap anyway," 

Maybe he shouldn't have filled Michael in, there was strength in numbers. 

"Don't lose each other you two!" Calum called as he steered Michael by the elbow out of the store. 

"I am the only one that noticed that we weren't actually given a reason why we couldn't come?" Ashton asked pulling his phone out of his pocket and checking the time before pocketing it again. 

Calum had all the subtlety of a hand grenade, Luke thought bitterly. "Yeah, I'm just gonna operate under the assumption that he's buying one of us a present," Luke said with a shrug before taking a tentative look around the store, "do you wanna go get food or do you need something in here?" 

"Oh no, I don't need anything, just came because Calum invited me and now he's ditched me," he rolled his eyes, "I could go for some food, there's this place that does delicious nachos like a block over if you wanna go?" 

"Um yes please I'm starving, Calum told me we were getting food," 

They left the store and set off down the block, moving through the usual Saturday morning city shoppers. He was just barely keeping track of Ashton as his thoughts wandered. Ashton seemed very nice and all but maybe Calum had been wrong in not telling him this was a setup, he wasn't really getting the message, at least Luke didn't think he was. There was something about him that seemed distracted, not disinterested of unfriendly just preoccupied. It seemed to Luke that there was a reason Calum had never set him up with anyone before and that it might have been because he wasn't very good at it. 

"So I didn't realise Calum was quite so chaotic," Ashton said, breaking the silence.

"He's not normally, I think he's just busy at the moment is all, his brains a little all over the place," Luke lied forcing himself not to roll his eyes. The other simply nodded before gesturing to a tiny storefront, they waded through people, and as they reached the door Luke let out a sigh, "I thought we were going to be stuck in between that lot all day, like surely not all of them need to be out and about today, go home,"

Ashton chuckled as he watched the taller boy threw a dirty look at the crowd they'd just waded through, "Come on, it'll probably be pretty quiet in here," 

He was right the place was practically empty and it was reasonably dark seeing as there were only windows at the front of the store. It was also quite cold due to the stone walls and tiled floors, but Ashton assured Luke that it was all worth it for the nachos. His cheerful demeanour and his decision to sit at the back where it was quiet and private coupled with the fact that this was obviously a favourite place of his had Luke hopefully. He wasn't really sure what he was hoping for, he wasn't really interested in the guy but he wasn't not interested if that made any sense? 

"Okay so you have to get the chicken, I mean you can get the beef, but you're going to regret it," Ashton told Luke as he watched him scanning the menu. 

"I guess I'll take your word for it," He said picking up their menus and standing, "do you want me to order.." he started to say but lost his train of thought as pretty girl with long dark hair caught his eye across the room. She hadn't caught his eye because she was so beautiful, he couldn't look away, but because she was already staring at them. The other boy turned to see what had cut Luke short and when he and the woman made eye contact, she smiled and started over towards them. 

"Hey Ash, I wondered if you still came here," she paused, and there was short non-awkward silence; which was made awkward by the way she quickly said, "how have you been?" 

Ashton looked as though he wanted to blush, "Oh yeah me and a few mates were out shopping, and Luke said he felt like nachos, don't really know anywhere better. But yeah, been pretty good, been catching up with Cal a fair bit," 

"Yeah it's the best place in the city for nachos for sure, I tried to catch up with Cal a few days ago, but he said he was busy, must have been with you," she chuckled, but it didn't really seem to come from anywhere except her mouth. 

The pair seemed wrapped up enough in the awkward exchange that Luke decided he could slip away. He felt uncomfortable watching the situation unfold considering he didn't know Ashton all that well and there was clearly a story there. So he slunk up to the counter and ordered two plates of chicken nachos and cokes and he stayed there watching the exchange from a distance. He could see the pity on the girls face from where he stood on the opposite side of the restaurant, she looked at Ashton like he was a little wounded bird. And he was clearly trying not to seem entirely enamoured with the beautiful girl, but his resolve broke as she reached out and touched his arm before she said goodbye. It was written all over his face that she could have asked him for anything and he would have given it to her. 

Luke had been set up with a broken man. 


	4. Chapter 4

**\- Luke Hemmings-**

** _[Monday - earlier in the day]_ **

**Ashton (Cal's friend)**

_Hey, Cal said you were interested in painting, I'm thinking about taking some classes but I kind of want someone to come with me, It's only $10 a class_

**New Message**

_Yeah sounds cool_

**Ashton (Cal's friend)**

_Awesome first class is tonight! It's in a studio on Oxford street._

______________

** _[Monday- present]_ **

So Luke was standing outside of the studio lent up against the wall waiting to go to a painting class he wasn't all that interested because Calum had lied. Fucking of course Calum had lied. He knew he shouldn't pity Ashton; pity didn't help anyone except the person doing the pitying and even then it was only to make themselves feel like they had cared enough. But Luke really did feel bad, and he felt bad that he felt bad, and he was very conflicted about whether he liked Ashton even just the littlest bit or if he just felt bad. He just wished they'd never run into the girl for both their sakes.

After she'd left Luke had gone back to the table, and Ashton was different. They ate their nacho's and drank their cokes and Ashton said thank you, and Luke thought that was when they were going to return to the others. He was wrong. That was when the older boy apologised and he told him the whole story.

She'd been a friend of Calum's first, and that's how Ashton had met Calum, he said he hadn't known that Calum wasn't talking to her anymore, but he kind of appreciated the solidarity. They'd dated for six months or so and they'd broken up a couple of months ago, it had been due to a massive misunderstanding. A female friend of his girlfriend (Emma) had been out to prove to her that he was a dick and would cheat as soon as he was given a chance. Her attempts had been mostly harmless and Ashton hadn't even realised that's what she was trying to do, he'd thought she liked hanging out with him. But soon enough her attempts had passed being harmless. She'd ended up planting a well-timed kiss on him that Emma had seen, then weeks passed before she'd speak to him and by then she'd moved on to someone else. Luke wasn't sure if he entirely bought the story, he's had a lot of assholes (Michael) tell him one story and their partner tell him something entirely different. He guessed it had to be somewhat true based on the tension between the girlfriend and Ashton just a few days ago.

He was tempted to text Calum and ask him what he knew about the whole thing, but Ashton appeared before he had a chance, "Hey! I'm so glad you came, I was kind of nervous if I'm honest," he streamed out before Luke had even looked up from his phone.

"It'll be fun, and if not we can ditch and go for a drink instead," Luke chuckled, sliding his phone into his back pocket.

This comment didn't seem to do much to his nerves because he just nodded and followed as Luke led the way upstairs, where he spoke to the teacher who explained that they didn't have too much to worry about, all they were doing today was feeling out everyone's skill level and understanding. Ashton seemed to calm a bit but still chose seats at the back of the room away from the door for them. They chatted somewhat mindlessly as they waited for the place to fill up, Luke wasn't able to get anything of much substance from Ashton as his nervous energy had his eyes distractedly searching the room over and over and whipping his head to the door every time a new face arrived.

When the class did start it went much the way their teacher had told them it would; the boys were trying to paint bubbles. Apparently, it was to see how firm their grasp of shading and highlighting was. Luke was getting quite frustrated, no matter what he seemed to do the bubble always looked somewhat oblong, how was it he couldn't even paint a circle? He sighed letting his eyes close as he dropped his brush into the water and began to rub the bridge of his nose. He opened them quickly when he remembered he wasn't alone and turned to look at Ashton praying that the other was having a better time than he was. He was the whole reason they were here after all. What he saw did not reassure him, the other had a deep frown on his face as he continued to move his brush in large circles, slowly covering a smaller circle blob on the page.

"I'm both relieved and disappointed that you're not way better at this than me," Luke said chuckling as Ashton began to let his brush cross the circle colouring it in.

His furrowed brow lifted and he turned to grin at Luke, "It's fun though, very therapeutic," he looked past the other to his own board, "Why does your bubble look like a booger?"

Luke turned to look at his own artwork tilting his head to the side, "it's one of those booger bubbles that little kids get when they cry and then try to breath out their nose," chuckles started to rumble in Ashton's chest before he began wholeheartedly laughing and the longer he went the harder Luke found it to keep the serious look on his face and started laughing too. "Okay, Okay, it's an abstract representation of the warped minds of children brought about by the time we live in,"

Ashton stopped laughing and looked at Luke; he could see the older boy was holding back a smile because his lips had disappeared as he held them tight in an attempt to remain serious. He raised an eyebrow at Luke and Luke simply nodded proudly in response and that was when Ashton's resolve broke, and he started chuckling again. Luke let out a laugh, "yeah I'm a learned bitch, what of it?"

This time Ashton's cheeks just flushed slightly and he fought a laugh turning back to his painting and Luke couldn't figure out what it was he'd done to elicit that response when he turned to face his own painting and saw the teacher behind him. He blushed, and the teacher (Dave) merely smiled widely and told Luke that despite its not so bubbly shape it seemed he had a pretty good understanding of shadows and then he disappeared, and Luke rounded on Ashton.

"You could have warned me!" He exclaimed.

"Was funnier to let you find out on your own," Ashton told him cheekily before placing a hand on Luke's shoulder. He'd thought the gesture was weird when he'd first done it, but then the other boy grinned at him and took his hand away, it was lightly coated in white/grey/blue colour, and Luke groaned looking down at his (thankfully old) shirt to see a matching handprint on his shoulder.

"You're such a dick, you're so lucky I followed the instructions and wore an old shirt," he playfully glared at the other, Ashton just chuckled in response before looking at his hand and realising he didn't have anywhere to place it without getting paint everywhere. "I believe that is what they call karma," 


	5. Chapter 5

**-Luke Hemmings-**

** _[Friday- two weeks later]_ **

Luke was standing in the hallway outside Calum's apartment, his eyes nearly rolling back into his head, he'd rung the bell nearly ten minutes ago and gotten an 'I'll be out in a sec' in response. He wasn't sure what Calum was doing in there if anything at all. So he was operating under the impression that he was just sitting on the other side the door waiting until he thought Luke had been tortured enough.

When he did finally open the door he was in a t-shirt and sweatpants, with a towel drying his hair, "sorry I was naked, and before you say anything I know you don't care but the lady across the hall has seen me naked twice since I moved in and that is two times too many," he chuckled to himself as he moved out of Luke's way and let him into the living area.

"I brought a bottle of wine and a six-pack, I didn't really know what exactly the vibe was," Luke said not paying Calum any mind as he let himself into the fridge to put the beers away and grabbed a pair or wine glasses out of the cupboard.

"Should be chill you're a bit overdressed though, Ashton might think you're trying a bit hard," Calum said looking him over. Luke had to admit that maybe he was a touch overdressed, but he hadn't been sure what to wear. He'd gone with black skinny jeans, boots and a button-up shirt, which had apparently been a mistake, Calum was dressed in a t-shirt with a hole in it and sweat pants, which by the looks of them didn't have underwear underneath.

He brought the wine glasses over to Calum, handing him one before joining him on the couch, "maybe Michael will be dressed nicely, and you'll be the odd one out,"

"We both know Michael never dresses nicely for movie's and drinks nights; also I live here so I can get changed whenever I want,"

"Okay, then can I get changed into your clothes please?"

"Why do you care? Is this about Ashton?" Calum chuckled to himself sipping at his wine glass before screwing up his nose. 

"Yeah sorry, it's a bit rough but I wanted strong, not good, and well don't you want me to care? You want us to get together,"

"Yeah you just didn't seem that sold on him is all,"

"Well yeah, I was sceptical at first because we ran into Emma in the city the other day. He seemed pretty gloomy, and the story seemed far fetched-"

Calum cut him off, " It's actually even more far-fetched because I'm pretty sure she put her friend up to catch him, I've been avoiding her, but I think she knows I know,"

"Anyway continuing what I was saying, I was sceptical, _but_ we had a really good time at the painting class even if you pretty much gave me no choice and made me go. Also, I will admit he is really fucking hot,"

"I know right? And I knew you'd get on, even if Ash is taking a little while to open up,"

Luke looked down and noticed his wine glass was already empty, he offered to get Calum another glass, and as he stood up, he felt the wine hit him. He'd drank it pretty quickly, but he didn't expect to feel it. He poured the last of the bottle into their two glasses and placed them on the coffee table before he disappeared into the hall heading straight for Calum's bedroom. He riffled through his drawers until he found a spare pair of sweat pants and an old rugby jersey of Calum's.

When he came back into the living room the other was sprawled across the couch searching for something to watch on Netflix, "look at me I'm you're little oooh wooh twink boyfriend," Luke chuckled turning to point at the back where 'hood' was printed above the number 7.

"Please never say any of that again," Luke laughed before giving a little run-up and launching himself onto the couch on top of Calum, "you knocked my glass you git," he complained trying to sit up with Luke awkwardly lying on his legs and middle. Luke moved himself back out of the road as the other gave him a disapproving look.

"Can you get my wine please, also where are the others?"

"I told them to come over at eight, so we'd have time to catch up,"

"Aw you're such a good best friend," Luke giggled.

"You're already so tipsy," Calum joined in giggling.

"I can't handle red wine okay," As he said this though he downed almost the entire glass.

Calum copied him, "Fuck, I've gotta keep up. You and Ashton's chances of success have doubled because Michael and Crystal are now officially together," Calum told him proudly.

"I don't think that your math checks out on that buddy," Luke chuckled, but before Calum could defend himself, there was another knock at the door.

Luke raced to the door pulling it open and visibly sighing when he saw who was on the other side. "Come in Michael," Luke said turning and going to back to sitting next to Calum. Michael made an offended face and a show of letting himself in and closing the door behind himself.

"You told me Michael wouldn't dress nice either," Luke whined letting his head fall onto Calum's shoulder.

"I wanted to impress Ashton," Michael said plainly grabbing three beers from the six-pack he'd brought before putting the rest in the fridge.

"I'm sorry buddy, you can go get changed if you want,"

"Can't be bothered," Luke grumbled pulling the decorative blanket down from the back of the couch to lay across his legs.

Calum curled his legs up and pulled the blanket, so it was covering them both. Michael gave them both a beer and as soon as he sat on the couch, there was another knock at the door.

"I guess I'm gonna have to get that?" He asked the other two, who nodded, and he sighed, getting up and opening up the door, "Ashton dressed nicely as well, you two are just slobs," he declared before smiling and moving out of the way for the fourth member of their party to join them inside.

Michael set Ashton up with a beer, and they all squeezed onto the couch, Luke sitting on Calum's lap to make room for the others. They finished a crime documentary and Michael and Luke's beers and were starting on the bottle of white Ashton had brought and Luke hadn't gotten much soberer if he were honest. Because of this, he was managing to miss large chunks of conversation.

So he came in halfway through Michael trying to make plans with Calum, "Okay so we should catch up I don't know like Friday?"

"You can't make plans with Cal! He's my cal," Luke announced frowning and spinning himself, so he was facing Calum with his legs on either side of the others'.

Calum shrugged and chuckled, "Sorry Mikey I am his Cal,"

"You're only saying that because Luke's in a position to crush your balls,"

"That's not very nice Michael," Luke announced standing up off Calum's lap, "say it now cal,"

"I am Luke's cal," Calum said faux solemnly.

Michael rolled his eyes, and Luke grinned, kissing Calum on the check before heading off to the kitchen to get himself another drink, satisfied that he had proven his point. As he entered the kitchen, his hip hit the corner of the counter, and he swore to himself.

"Stop beating up the counter," Ashton chuckled from behind him. Luke turned embarrassed, he stepped back into the other counter, "seriously stop wailing on the kitchen," Luke laughed bringing his hand up to cover his face.

"I didn't realise you and Calum were _that_ close," Ashton added.

Luke internally smirked, taking a step forward, "We aren't that close,"

"You were climbing all over him all night,"

He got closer to Ashton again, nearly walking the older boy into the island behind him. "I could be all over you tonight," his finger found the others belt loop and tugged him forward so their faces were only inches apart. 

Ashton blushed slightly, Luke could tell he was trying to hide it but it didn't work, he didn't step away from him though, "You're drunk Luke,"

"Kind of, but the offer still stands,"

Ashton rolled his eyes and left the kitchen without getting a drink.

** _[Saturday]_ **

**New Message**

_Sorry for being so forward last night, I was pretty tipsy_

**Ash**

_It's fine, I didn't realise you were gay _ _so it was just kind of out of nowhere for me_

**New Message**

_Oh really? I thought Cal would have mentioned it_

**Ash**

_Why would he tell me_ _ lmao? Calum's just running around giving everyone facts about everyone. Ahahaha but seriously it's all good, everyone does dumb stuff when they're drinking_


	6. Chapter 6

**-Luke Hemmings-**

** _[Saturday - a week later]_ **

"Stop buying me drinks! I know you're trying to throw me off my game but it's not going to work, I'm just better than you," Calum huffed before turning his head sassily and readying himself to putt. 

Luke sighed and sipped his beer and then the one in his other hand he'd gotten for Calum. When the brown-skinned boy had invited him to a mini-golf bar he'd thought the bar bit had been pretty clear. Calum had seemingly solely been interested in the mini-golf part because he'd had half off one beer and they were a quarter of the way through the 18 holes. Luke was on his fourth (it would have been two but he Calum kept denying the drinks he'd bought for him). He noted the score of the other before he picked up his own little club and took his turn. He didn't do as well as Calum though there was only one point in it but the other led the way to the next hole very pleased with himself. 

"Are you going to be annoyingly competitive all night?" Luke grumbled putting his beers down on the scorekeeper's table, he'd decided he was done being over it, he was annoyed with the other. 

Calum turned and glared but when he saw Luke's serious look his face softened, "I'm sorry I'm just in a bad mood, that stupid prick came into work today and he was all nice and friendly to me and then he went over to talk to Alana and chatted with her very loudly 'Oh yeah we're not together anymore, yeah I know it's sad but that's what happens when you cheat on me I don't put up with it, I'm seeing someone new anyway. Oh, you didn't know? That tall bloke that always comes in here with him," Calum's brow was dipping lower and lower, the corners of his lips turned down and his jaw set. If people thought he had a resting bitch face normally they would have found that this made Calum's resting bitch face look delightful and chipper by comparison. "He's fucking telling people that I cheated on him with you, like what the actual fuck does he think he's doing?"

Whenever he said 'That Stupid Prick' Luke immediately knew that he was talking about his ex Daniel. He was really a stupid prick, he had a job selling cars at a dealership a little out of the city and he was good at it, and those skills translated pretty well into picking up guys. He'd charmed Calum within the first 20 minutes they'd met which had been at a party of a friend of a friend. Because of that none of them had really known anything about him but he was a handsome, charming sort of guy that really liked Cal. Months later when they'd spoken to the friend who'd invited them to the party and found out he was kind of a germ it was too late, Calum was in love with him. Michael and Luke had slowly started to notice the little signs after that and they couldn't do a damn thing, he was too in love. Eventually, things had come to an end when Daniel had found another 'piece of ass' that had more money and a nicer apartment for him to mooch off of. 

So the reaction wasn't surprising, Luke and Michael almost hated the guy more than Calum did but when 'The Stupid Prick' was mentioned it was best to keep quiet and let Calum get it all out before trying to comfort him. 

He was still seething however when he turned and took his next shot which went about as badly as it could and he swore and kicked the edge of the putt-putt course. Luke pulled the club out of Calum's hand, he resited a little but eventually let it go. He wrapped an arm around the back of Cal pulling him into his chest, forcing his head to rest on his chest. The other struggled but Luke knew he didn't really want out of the hold, he was much stronger than Luke when he wanted to be. Luke sighed heavily and looked around to check and make sure no one was paying them any attention, and they weren't they were all plenty drunk and preoccupied with themselves. He felt his shirt dampening and so he started rubbing his hand comfortingly with the same hand he'd held Calum there with. The other still awkwardly holding a golf club at his side. 

"Wanna go sit in the beer garden?" he asked quietly and felt the nod against his chest, he let him out of his grip and led him by the small of his back through the bottom level of the bar and out into the empty beer garden. Calum kept his head down not wanting anyone to see the wetness near his eyes. 

"I don't even fucking care about him anymore, I literally don't but I'm just so fucking angry that he's going around talking about me like that. Where does he get off?" 

"He's just a rat, he knows that the only way he'll be able to sucker anyone into getting with him is making them feel bad for him. He's a salesman through and through and this is how he's marketing himself. Kind of pathetic if you ask me," He went to sip at his beer but realised he'd left them both behind. 

"Guess you're right, wish there was a way I could warn people about what an asshole he is," 

"Recon you could convince him to get a tattoo that says "I'm a Wanker' in comic sans?" Luke made a gesture across his forehead showing off where the tattoo should go. 

Calum chuckled, "Maybe in Chinese," 

"Ugh, I'm honestly surprised he doesn't already have a sweet and sour pork order on his arm, he's exactly that kind of tool. 'It means new life,'" Luke put on a dumb dude bro voice and made an obnoxious face as he said the last part. 

Calum grinned and laughed before putting his nose in the air and proudly announcing "I pick much better for other people than I do for myself honestly, Crystal and Michael are like practically inseparable now, which is cute, Michael deserves someone nice," a small smile formed on Calum's face as he filled with pride. 

Luke laughed softly, "Yeah I tried to organise lunch with him yesterday but he had already told Crystal they'd go to lunch. We're never going to see him again I swear." 

"Once you and Ashton get together you won't even care that Michael's busy all the time," he waggled his eyebrows grinning this time. 

He rolled his eyes, "You know I just don't think he's that interested, he's really nice and cute and yes kind of funny but I'm really not that worried if nothing comes of it." 

"We'll see, we'll see," Calum chuckles, "anyway let's just leave it at that, I'll go get us drinks,"

Luke shook his head as he watched the other's figure disappeared inside. He was such a strange creature when he wanted to be but he always had the best intentions, maybe he ought to give Ashton a bit more of a shot.


	7. Chapter 7

**-Luke Hemmings-**

** _[Monday Evening - two weeks later]_ **

Luke was waiting at the same desks they'd been occupying the past few weeks trying his hardest not to look like he was sad a friendless. He'd kept hanging out with Ashton for Calum, not that hanging out with him was a chore but he kept being a little flirty and was putting in far more effort than when he hung out with Michael and him that was for sure. He was wearing the same shirt he'd worn the first week which was now littered with handprints, 'it's a statement about the way we look at women and how our leers feel on their skin,' Luke had tried to explain to Ashton as he'd added more handprints the week before that he wasn't a female and Ashton had told him he should stop wearing the shirt. 

"Hey! I didn't get your usual 'are you coming this week' text, I wasn't sure you were going to be here," Ashton grinned plonking himself down on his regular chair beside Luke. 

"I figured we were past that and I could just assume you were going to be here," Luke shrugged. 

Ashton's smile persisted, "I thought I told you not to wear that shirt again," 

"You're the one who did this to my shirt, you knew who was going to be wearing it, a little bit of foresight babe," Luke chuckled looking up as their teacher greeted them all. 

Ashton shifted in his seat a little uncomfortable, "I don't accept critiques of my art," he tilted his nose up, snottily. 

"I beg your pardon but _I_ am the art, so I feel my opinions valid," Luke sniffed haughtily. 

"Ugh the art always has opinions, I need to move back into impressionism, didn't give me as much lip," 

Luke just rolled his eyes, his attention quickly turned to their teacher who was walking around handing out pieces of butchers paper for them. They remained quiet for the first fifteen minutes or so as he explained what he wanted them to attempt this evening and that he'd be around to everyone eventually to give them some tips. The pair were mostly silent at first, both trying individually to mix their colours with water being mindful of the fact that the teacher had said the gouache was very expensive and to be careful not to waste any. That was all well and fine until Luke put his palette down to get biscuits out of his backpack and when he came back up he hit his head on the bottom of the palette and knocked it on top of Ashton's. There was enough conversation in the room that no one really paid any attention to the clank and Luke sheepishly rose the rest of the way up, he could feel the flush in his cheeks but tried to remain composed. Ashton was looking at him with a hand over his mouth, he could tell from his eyes though that it wasn't hiding a sympathetic gaping mouth but a grin. 

"Shut up, it was an accident," he grumbled. 

Ashton removed the hand chuckling almost evily, "I'm not laughing at your accident, I'm laughing at the fact you have blue paint all through your hair." His hands reflexively went to his hair and he felt the moisture immediately, he groaned bringing his hands down so he could see them, they were smeared with dark blue paint. Another groan left him as he remembered he hadn't mixed it with any water yet, it was just rich, expensive blue paint. 

He sat up in his chair properly and looked and Ashton who was still grinning, and then he saw it and started laughing himself. Ashton joined in wheezing too, which just made Luke laugh harder because he thought they were laughing at Luke. They continued like this for a few minutes before he was finally able to collect himself, "I'm not laughing at me, I'm laughing at the orange paint all over your nose," 

Ashton's mouth dropped open and he went to wipe at his face, Luke shook his head and gestured for him to wipe from further up and then straight down, which Ashton did and in doing so smeared paint all down his nose and under his left eye. Luke started cackling again. "Fuck you, Hemmings," 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Luke told him still chuckling. He got up and washed his hands grabbing a bit of paper towel and dampening it before racing back over to Ashton. He gestured for Ashton to move his hand away from his face and he gently wiped the paint off of his face. He could feel the other's eyes intently on him as he dabbed at orange smudges on his nose, he shifted his eyes and they met. It was once he was already wiping the paint off of Ashton's face that he realised just how intimate the gesture was. Their eyes were locked because honestly where else were they supposed to look? Luke took a step back and let his eyes shift down as he rearranged the wad of paper so the paint was on the inside before he took the hand Ashton had wiped his face with and gently cleaned it. His other hand supported Ashton's arm his thumb resting across the inside of his elbow and he could feel the older boys quick pulse. He lingered a little too long before dropping the hand. 

"Guess I should go and clean up my hair in the bathroom, I'll be back," He left a little to quickly and rushed out into the hall, he also realised he'd never used the bathroom while he was there. He took a tentative look around the hall before quietly heading down a flight on the creaking staircase. Once he found the bathroom the paint washed out of his hair pretty easily, not that he was that worried about it being in there. He had come to the shocking but somehow not at all shocking realisation that he had feelings for Ashton. Calum had been right. The more time he'd spent with Ashton the more he'd started to like him. Fucking Calum. 

He splashed his face with water and made his way back up to the studio with his new realisation sitting in the back of his mind. He headed back down to their table to find Ashton and the guy who sat at the front of the class chatting. Luke sat himself down beside them.

Ashton noticed him and turned, "Oh hey, you got it all out," he said chirpily, "Sorry Chris this is Luke, Luke, Chris," he said gesturing between them. 

Chris gave him a little wave before turning back to Ashton and asking, "This isn't your boyfriend is it?" Ash laughed and shook his head, Luke's stomach dropped as he watched the exchange, he'd had this conversation before, he knew exactly where it was going. "Oh good, cause I was wondering you if you wanted to go out sometime?" 

"Oh wow, um, I'm really flattered but I'm actually not into guys, sorry,"

He was going to fucking kill Calum Hood.


	8. Chapter 8

**-Luke Hemmings-**

** _[Tuesday]_ **

"I can't believe you lied to me, he's not even into guys," Luke was pacing back and forth in Calum's living room.

"I just thought you guys would work well together," Calum said, he made a step as if to follow Luke in his pacing but the other boy rounded on him. 

"You could have introduced him to me as a friend!"

"But, I know he's into guys, I can tell,"

Luke stopped pacing and rounded on Calum, his face turning severe, "No. No, you don't know anything, for fuck sake Calum this isn't some shitty fucking early 2000's romcom, we are real people with feelings. You can't do that to people, if he is into guys then that's up to him to work out in his own time. You of all people should know that. This shit isn't a joke," Luke sighed and rubbed his temples. "I never ever thought you would do something like this, I'm so angry with you, I'm so disappointed and I just can't believe that you would be so manipulative. I'm so angry,"

Calum opened his mouth to speak, but Luke cut him off, "I have feelings for him because you encouraged me to go after him, I-I- Just stay away from me, I don't wanna see you for a while,"

Luke stormed out the door and slammed it behind him. He'd thought that giving it the night and then going over to see Calum the next day would have calmed him down. It hadn't, he'd had the whole night to stew on it and it had just made him even madder. Never in his life had he been this mad at a friend. He was seething and he didn't know what to do. Part of him wanted to tell Ashton, he was, of course, the person with the most to be angry about in this situation. Luke had been flirting with him for over two months and as soon as Luke said anything it would all click into place, he clearly hadn't been getting the message that he was being flirted with, but he would as soon as the words 'setup' and 'gay' were mentioned.

And straight guys tended to get weird when it was in any way insinuated they were gay or you thought they were gay. Probably the deeply ingrained homophobia.

He was just at such a loss for what to do, he wanted to tell someone. Needed to tell someone. It was just so much in his brain and so many things he wanted to say. He grabbed his earphone case from his front pocket and went to put his earphones in, he missed one and dropped it on the floor and let out a loud 'UHHHGH' and stood up he didn't even care if someone had just seen him. He was livid. He walked as if with purpose toward the city centre his earphones in properly now and his temper still hot.

He didn't really have anywhere he was supposed to be going he was just walking.


	9. Chapter 9

Luke had kept his mouth shut so far; it had only been a week, though. The fact that he'd lasted that long when he'd been stewing like a pot over Calum the whole time was a miracle.

He knew he couldn't just stop hanging out with Ashton all of a sudden either, but some part of him felt incredibly guilty hanging out with the boy when he knew he was keeping something that would upset him from him. He'd reasoned with himself that Calum was the only good friend Ashton had right now and that if he told him, then Ashton might end up without anyone he could actually talk to because Lord knows him and Luke weren't the sharing type of friends yet. So to keep things as normal as possible they were thrift shopping together, his heart was doing backflips and his head was aching with moral ambiguity. Ashton had been excited to show him this place saying it was where he found all the best stuff and that Luke was sure to find whatever he was looking for here. He greatly doubted they stocked piece of mind, but he was here nonetheless.

"If I wore this, do you think people would get that I'm being ironic," Ashton lifted a dark navy shirt with a man riding a horse and roping a steer with 'Threesome' written underneath. He was grinning at this apparently 'amazing' find of his.

"If you do anything ironically in front of strangers you may as well be doing it genuinely," Luke said with a shrug of his shoulders. Okay so he was having a hard time acting normal, he was stuck between cold indifference and flirting shamelessly. Yes he knew that being friendly was the third and best options but being friendly would make him feel like he had to tell him about Calum's setup and there his brain was again trying to find a solution to the same problem he'd been stuck on for a week.

"True, I also don't get it, like at all," he put the shirt back and kept looking through the rack. Luke was standing behind him hands in pockets and completely spaced out, he stepped away from Ashton, looking at the jewellery display case and nodding as he continued to talk about something he'd seen or heard or done. Luke was too busy still trying to figure out what the fuck he was going to do about their friendship to really listen. He then spotted a large ornate ring, engraved with intricate patterns, it looked hand made to him because he could see small imperfections in the detailing, but without close inspection, the ring looked flawless. "Oh wow that's gorgeous," Ashton spoke behind him, Luke hummed, "you should get it," Luke was nodding, actively not looking up as he became more and more enamoured with the ring in front of him. He was both in love with the ring and kind of ignoring Ashton for both his head and his heart's sake. It was only when he heard the bell above the door, chime that he broke from his forced demeanour. He turned and saw Ashton too had instinctively turned to investigate.

You could have picked Luke's jaw up off the ground after he'd seen where the other's gaze was trained. The girl, the girlfriend, fucking Emma. Luke was beginning to think she was trying to torture Ashton, which he became more convinced of when the door opened again, and a man stepped in. He said something lowly to her and then snaked an arm around her waist, pecking her lips.

He looked to see the older boys reaction, but he was gone, he'd already raced past the pair and was on his way out the door. Luke had panicked, he wanted to help him, he knew how embarrassed he must have felt, all his self-indulgent brooding from earlier disappeared and he quickly called out after him. "You don't even have the keys to try and move it; I'll just pay the ticket- ugh he's not even listening to me," and raced out the door after him.

He could see Ashton was walking quickly up ahead, he stopped, turned back, stopped turned back in the first direction and then just stopped altogether. Luke jogged up to him; he seemed entirely unaware of anyone else's presence. He didn't know what to say so he waited thinking maybe, though grief-stricken Ashton might start the conversation. He didn't.

"Hey, why don't you come back to my place, it's not far from here," tears were welling in the other eyes so instead of waiting for a response Luke started walking, and the watery-eyed boy followed. They walked quickly to the bus stop and got on and then off quietly and politely a three or so stops away walking the rest of the way to Luke's without incident.

He opened the door to his apartment as quickly as he could, wanting to get Ashton inside before the first tear fell because Luke certainly knows that crying in the hallway in front of your neighbours/ strangers is not the best feeling. So as soon as the door opened, he pulled it back and let the shorter man inside before following him in and joining him on the couch. He could see the tears pooling, and he could almost see the thoughts ticking over in his mind.

"It was all a misunderstanding, and we'd been together for ages, and she's just over it, moved on that quickly?" and there it was the thought they'd all had, Luke assumed Calum included. Maybe his girlfriend had never really cared all that much, or perhaps she'd been looking for any out.

The tears started to slip down Ashton's cheeks, and so he got up quickly and brought the boy back a glass of water and a box of tissues.

"Honestly, does it even matter? If she is over and moved on, yeah it fucking hurts but aren't you glad you're rid of her if she didn't care that much? You could still be dating her and not even realise that she's so cold," Luke tried to reason.

Ashton simply nodded and sipped at his water.

Luke sighed, "Okay, why'd the banana go to the hospital?"

"You're really going to make jokes right now?" he asked, Luke just gave him a look and then it was his turn to sigh," I don't know, why did the banana go to the hospital?"

"Because he wasn't peeling very well," Luke started laughing hard at his own joke.

"That probably was because he was under-ripe," Ashton explained unhelpfully.

He sighed, "Ash, don't look for reasoning, just laugh at my skilful play on words." Before the other could respond, he continued, "What did one plate whisper to the other plate?" Ashton shrugged, "Dinner's on me," Luke faux whispered, before chuckling again to himself.

They continued on in this fashion, Luke making terrible jokes and Ashton not laughing until all they were doing was laughing. Luke had ended up kneeling in front of the other, telling him jokes from between his knees on the floor.

The tears were almost entirely gone, only small wet patches remained in the corners of his eyes, and he was breathing heavily as their laughter came to an end. Luke felt a sense of pride swell within him; it seemed like Ashton had, had a moment to take a step back from why he was so miserable. He knew he hadn't fixed the problem, but for now, he was smiling and laughing.

Luke was smiling too, he was happy he'd made Ashton happy, the boy had the most gorgeous smile and even if he was straight that didn't suddenly mean that he was immune to gorgeous guys giving me crinkly-eyed smiles. Much like with the ring he was enamoured. Without much thought, or maybe far too much thought, he pressed up and let his lips connect with Ashton's. He felt a hand snake up to the collar of his shirt and grab at the fabric, he thought surely this was Ash pulling him off, but the hand tugged the shirt and by extension Luke up onto the couch and Ashton's lap. Their lips broke apart as he settled himself on the older boys lap and then Ashton was hungrily reconnecting them. His kissing was feverish and needy, and his hands were gripping tightly, one on Luke's neck and the other on his waist. Luke was half sitting up on his knees not wanting to fully collapse into Ashton, so his hands rested on the back of the couch, holding himself just slightly above the other. He could feel him pulling him down, encouraging him to fall into him. He thought maybe the other didn't quite realise how much bigger Luke was than him, that he was much heavier than any of the girls he'd probably had in this position.

That thought pulled him from the moment, and he quickly shot back, "I'm so sorry you were upset, and I took advantage of you. I, this is my fault, I-"

Ashton groaned, "don't care right now I just want to forget about her," he pressed up to kiss Luke again, but the taller boy had turned his head, and he connected with his cheek instead. "I'm serious, Luke, I need this," he whined lowly against Luke's cheek, and his cock was fighting his rational brain at the sound. He turned his head slightly and their lips connect again, Ashton returned to his needy kissing, successfully pulling him all the way down onto his lap where despite Luke still being apprehensive his hips moved without his consent and ground down into Ashton's.

He broke their kiss and groaned, pulling at Luke's shirt again, this time to get it off rather than bring him closer. His hands went to Ashton's buttons, but their lips met again, and Luke's intentions of removing the other's shirt were forgotten. Ashton however clearly had better focus because while they were still snogging his hands made for the zipper of Luke's pants. The button and zipper where feeble obstacles for Ashton's hands, one snaking into the jeans to start working his cock through his briefs. Luke sucked in a sharp breath of air because fuck straight guys did not just grab your cock like that.

Luke found that Ashton did a lot of things without asking him that straight guys should definitely need help with. Like getting blow jobs from men, Luke distinctly remembered there being something about that they didn't like. Or the ability to open him up on the couch so well he was a whimpering mess, seemed like a learned skill, not an instinct. He hadn't voiced any of these thoughts even when he was on his hands and knees on the couch and could feel Ashton's lubed cock press into him. His strong hands held Luke's waist as he slammed in and out over and over. Moans and groans leaving them both as their orgasms neared, Luke worked his own cock in his a hand and came with a primal noise from the back of his throat. He'd liked to have pretended he normally lasted longer, but after being fingered like that it was a miracle the other had even gotten inside him. Ashton pounded in and out, again and again, Luke was slumped over with his head on the couch and ass in the air, breathing heavily. His hole fluttered from the stimulation of its now sensitive nerves. If he hadn't been so fucked out this might have started to get him hard again but he was tired. He rolled his head and looked up, over his shoulder at Ashton and saw sweat beading on his forehead and his hair damp flicking as he thrust. He noticed that his eyes were closed. Usually, guys couldn't help but stare at Luke and run their hands up and down his back and shoulders, but Ashton's hands remained planted on his waist and his eyes closed. The look on his face as he came though was almost euphoric and reassured Luke that he'd enjoyed himself.

"Oh fuck yes, Emma," He cried as his orgasm rippled through him.

That explained a lot.


	10. Chapter 10

Ashton had climbed out of Luke's bed and started moving around the room, looking for his clothes. Luke couldn't see him from where he lay, but he could hear movement and imagined the boy flitting around the room looking for things he was almost certain were in the lounge room.

"Going to slip out while you think I'm sleeping? How classic," Luke chuckled rolling over onto his back and opening his eyes. Luke wasn't really ready to have any sort of conversation about what happened the night before.

His eyes followed Ashton's bare ass distracting him until the older boy spoke, "I was looking for my clothes, I wanna have a shower,"

"You could just borrow something of mine if you want," Luke yawned sitting up, and tilting his head toward the dresser across the room.

"I'd be more comfortable in my own stuff," Ashton said with a shrug lifting up a pair of Luke's jeans.

"Fair, I think your jeans are in the lounge room, but your shirt is in here somewhere I'm pretty sure,"

Ashton hummed and headed into the lounge room; Luke got up unabashedly ready to follow the older man entirely naked when he realised that just because Ashton seemed like he was taking things well didn't mean he should shove his dick in his face. He grabbed a pair of briefs and a shirt before following the older boy into the living room, just outside his bedroom door.

He didn't know what would spook the other so the room remained silent for a few moments before he decided it would be safe to ask, "Do you want a cup of coffee or something?"

"Uh, yeah, I guess, that sounds good," he responded absentmindedly, making a small celebratory sound before pulling a pair of jeans out from under the coffee table. He shimmied them up his legs before joining Luke where he stood around an island bench in the kitchen. He took a seat and watched as Luke busied himself, making the coffees. They only spoke to confirm milk and sugar ratios, until the taller boy finally pushed a mug across the counter to Ashton and they were forced to make eye contact.

He took a long sip of his coffee, his eyes flitted down to his mug in an attempt to avoid the eye contact, until he seemingly decided he'd just say it, "We can't tell either of the boys,"

Luke wasn't shocked and couldn't honestly say he really wanted to tell the boys either, "Definitely can't tell Calum he would be far too smug, he only got us to meet because he was trying to set us up,"

"Wow... really?, I swear he knows I'm not bi or anything. That is also exactly why we can't tell them; they'll know this isn't because I'm gay, they'll know I'm using this as a coping mechanism. I'm self-aware enough to admit that, but I don't want them trying to reason with me,"

Luke simply nodded as he swallowed the coffee in his mouth. 'Coping mechanism', cool, that was his new identifier. He decided it was best just to leave his response at a nod.

There was a silence that for Luke felt awkward, but Ashton seemingly didn't feel it. He'd been watching the other boy for a few moments before he put his coffee down on the counter and rounded the corner of the island slowly until he was standing in front of Luke. "You know I don't think I'm coping real well," his tone dripped with a fake coyness.

Luke's head had two opinions formulating and a cock that was already interested. Opinion one was that if he did this, he was taking advantage of the older boy, who was clearly confused and upset. The second opinion was that Ashton was a twenty-five-year-old man and could fuck whoever he wanted. He still hadn't decided which view he preferred when Ashton's hand snaked down and started to rub Luke's cock through his briefs.

He took a sharp breath as the hand slid further until Ashton's middle finger was gently running along the younger boys taint and up, almost reaching his hole before pulling back and starting again.

"Okay, okay, your unhealthy coping mechanism wants to get rammed, hurry up," Luke all but whined.

Ashton chuckled before grabbing Luke's wrists and pulling him forward, then walking him backwards and turning him around pressing him forward to bend him over one of the barstools. He pulled the bottom of his shirt up and the top of his briefs down to his mid-thighs.

Ashton barely hesitated before slipping a spit-lubed finger into Luke's still slightly loosened hole. "You remember there's lube in the bedroom, right?" Luke asked weakly from where his head lay on the next chair over.

"One sec, stay there," Ash said, pulling his finger out before dashing off to the bedroom, returning seconds later with the small tube in hand.

He went back to opening the other boy up as quickly as he could, he was three fingers deep in Luke's ass with the younger boy moaning and pressing his hips back into him when reached a hand back and tugged for Ashton to pull out.

The older boy looked at him confused before watching as the other dropped to his knees and began unbuttoning his jeans, seeing the older boy hadn't found his briefs in his search of the apartment. He tugged his cock out, aimlessly groping for the lube on the bench above him. He added a small amount of Lube to Ashton before starting to work him in his hand. Short rough strokes trying to get the boy fully hard before he took him into his mouth. It didn't take long, and Luke's mouth was slurping and sucking obscenely at Ashton's cock. Small pleasured sighs were leaving Ashton, and his hand reached down stroking at Luke's hair gently, he looked up to see the older boys head lolled back and his eyes closed face blissed out. The hand blindly found its way down to hold the side, of Luke's face before it returned to his hair, threading his fingers through it and starting to fuck the younger boys mouth gently.

He didn't open his eyes or move his hands again until he was pulling Luke off him, "wanna fuck you properly now," he groaned.

Luke returned to his bent-over position on the chair. Ashton lubed and lined himself up before pushing in and starting to thrust almost immediately. Luke whined both at the intoxicating feeling of Ashton just grazing his prostate over and over again. And the feeling of his cock rubbing on his stomach and the soft leather of the chair creating great friction. 


	11. Chapter 11

Luke was wiping down his barstool, Ashton was in the shower and they had still not had a proper conversation about what was going on between them. It didn't seem like something they were ever going to get around to if he were honest with himself. A knock at the door disturbed his self-pitying thought, and a new thought took its place. Who the fuck was that? 

Whoever it was he couldn't let them know there was someone else here, there would be far too many questions. 

"One Second!" he called, racing into the bathroom, he yanked the door open and slid the glass shower door back before Ashton could even protest, "Someone's at the door, get in my bedroom," 

Ashton's eyes went wide and he quickly climbed out of the shower, Luke shoving the first towel he saw into his hands. He watched as the other fled the bathroom with still wet and slightly soapy hair and he then realised he was only wearing his underwear and followed suit. 

"Who is it?" Ashton asked bringing the towel up to stop his hair from dripping down his neck and shoulders. 

Luke pulled on a t-shirt off the floor before responding, "I honestly don't know, they didn't say anything when I called out, but just stay in here I'll get rid of them as soon as I can," he gave the other a tight smile before going back into the living room and pulling the door firmly closed behind himself. He realised he was still only in underwear and a t-shirt but knew he'd already taken too long to answer the door. 

When he did finally answer the door he stood with his legs behind the door and his head and shoulders peering out around it trying to hide his scarcely covered bottom half. It was just Calum, he begrudgingly opened the door the rest of the way letting the other in, quickly closing it behind him. 

"Make whatever you're going to say quick, I had to cut my shower short to answer the door," he lied. 

Calum was avoiding eye contact up until this point when he sighed and looked up, "I just wanted to come over and apologise properly. I spoke to Michael and he helped me realise what I did was pretty manipulative and cruel to you and Ashton. Even if he is gay, it has nothing to do with me and he'll come to that realisation when he's ready," 

Luke's shoulders softened from their reflexively rigid state, "Wow, that's not exactly what I was expecting, but yeah it was shitty and dumb and manipulative, but I forgive you because I know you're being genuine," Luke sighed, part of him just wanted to spill his guts to Calum instead he said, "I thought you should know that I told Ashton what you did as well," 

Calum nodded, "Yeah that's fair, I'll go talk to him after work, I'm on lunch right now, I just couldn't get through the day without apologising, I just felt really shit about it," 

"Well, thanks I appreciate you not being an ass, I'm not used to being this mad at you," 

He grinned in response, "I gotta get back to work but I'll text you later?" 

Luke nodded and then Calum was on his way. As soon as he shut the door behind him and called out his goodbye, he heard Ashton open the bedroom door. 

"Okay, so what did Calum do that he should be apologising to us for?" 

Luke sighed again, "so you heard all of that?" 

Ashton nodded and the tall boy just started walking toward the bathroom, he could feel the other following him and left the door open behind him, "You can wash that shampoo out of your hair while I explain," luke offered sitting down on the floor facing the shower.

"Is this just so you can perv on me?" Ashton asked dropping his towel and starting to fiddle with the temperature. 

Luke rolled his eyes and shifted himself across the small room and sat with his back resting on the glass shower wall. "So you know how I said Calum wanted us to get together? Well, he knows you're straight but he decided he thinks your gay and that we would be good together. So before that lunch, he tells me that he has this amazing friend, funny, attractive and smart and that he wants to set us up but doesn't want to tell the guy cause he just got out of a relationship. So it's going to be a setup, but not really and that I should hang out with you and see how things go."

"That explains so much," Ashton's said, a small sense of aw in his voice, "that's why you were surprised that I didn't know you were gay, and why you hit on me at Calum's," Luke was nodding his head, assuming the older boy was looking at him. "You aren't like into me, right? Like you don't have feelings for me or anything?" he asked apprehensively. 

"No," Luke said with a pointless eye roll, "Calum just really wanted us to work out and I didn't know you weren't gay so I was actually trying, until yesterday, I was so uncomfortable all day yesterday. I felt so guilty hanging out with you when you didn't know Calum was a little prick," 

"It was kind of a dick move, but really he hurt you more than me ya know? People always think I'm gay or bi, I don't know why," Ashton confessed and Luke imagined him shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. 

Yeah, I wonder what makes people think you like men, might be because your cock fell in my arse, Luke thought somewhat bitterly. 

"Come on Luke stop brooding, if you come and sit by the door I'll shampoo your hair for you," Ashton suggested, he complied taking his shirt off and sitting just inside the shower for Ashton to start washing his hair. His fingers dug into his scalp perfectly and made Luke want to moan as he felt some of his tensions leave him along with the burden that was washing his hair. 


	12. Chapter 12

Just because Luke was smart enough to see that things weren't going to end well did not mean that he was putting a stop to them. Which is why it was nearly three weeks later and he and Ashton hadn't stopped having sex. Their friends still didn't know and they still hadn't actually spoken about it, unless you counted, 'I want you to fuck me' as talking about it. Luke wouldn't have usually but if things continued on the way they were that was probably as deep as that conversation was going to get.

The four of them were hanging out and things had mostly gone back to normal, Calum was overcompensating a little because he felt bad. Ashton had led the charge on getting things back to normal because like with apparently everything he pretended nothing had happened, which had honestly worked.

Luke still felt reserved, separated almost from the others, especially Calum. He wanted to just climb onto his lap and tell him everything that had happened, and then the other would give him some wise speech and everything would be fine. He didn't have it in him to out Ashton, as, as well whatever he was. Closeted? In-denial? A sexual fiend? It didn't really matter either way because he wasn't going to tell Calum. He couldn't.

His eyes had glazed over and he was staring off into space thinking all this when he felt a hand on his neck and flinched. It was Michael, he was slightly pulling the collar of Luke's shirt down.

"Geeze Luke, you're fucking covered in hickeys and they're dark as fuck," he chuckled. The other two sat up in their seats and craned their necks to see, "are you seeing someone?"

"Seeing is a, uh, strong word. I met them on Tinder, it's nothing serious," he replied uncomfortable under everyone's gaze.

Michael chuckled again, "normally you're the one doing the marking, someones making a little bottom bitch out of you," Calum joined him in his laughter.

He rolled his eyes before quipping back, "Like Crystal's ever let you top,"

"Oooooh," Calum laughed, "Michael does like to get pegged," Ashton started laughing too and Michael looked as though he might blush.

"Oh come on Michael you gotta be ready to hear stuff like that when you start making comments about my sex life. Also, tops get hickeys too, hickeys are for everyone,"

"Yeah everyone under the age of 15," Michael scoffed.

"And adults that like to mark people, kinky motherfuckers," Calum added.

Luke was keen to get off the topic, "I'm gonna grab a drink, you guys want anything?"

They all shook their heads, and he got up and went into the kitchen, sitting himself up on the counter and sighing. He let his eyes close and his head fall back. Everything was weird. He heard someone else enter the kitchen and his head snapped up, his eyes open. It was Ashton.

"So you're my bottom bitch, hey?" he asked, slotting himself in between the taller boys legs. Luke opened his mouth to make a snarky comment but Ashton's lips were on his neck, kissing up to his jaw, stopping to suck on a point before rest his hands on the taller boys thighs to reach up and kiss along his jaw and then his lips.

When their lips met it was dizzying for Luke. He pressed down into the shorter boy, opening his mouth, feeling as though he was begging for the other to invite him in. One of his hands found its way to the side of Ashton's face and then he finally opened his mouth letting their tongues meet. Their kissing became more feverish, their breathing heavy until finally, Ashton pulled away.

"I need to go back to the others," Ashton said, trying to steady his breathing, "Do I look like I just got the shit snogged out of me?"

Luke reached his hand back up shifting Ashton's hair so it would sit the way it normally did and then shook his head, "No you look fine now, tell them I'll be out in a second,"

Ashton nodded and disappeared from the room as quickly as he's appeared. Luke let his head fall back again and a deep sigh left him. What the fuck was going on with Ashton, that was the first time he'd kissed him since that first night. Was he really that turned on by having Luke all marked up? He made a silent groan of frustration not wanting the others to hear him.

He was honestly pretty turned on and tempted to rub one out in Calum's kitchen, but the thought of Calum slowly dampened the need. Interesting. 


	13. Chapter 13

"Yeah, could I please get, one double chocolate brownie and one choc mint," Ashton asked the girl behind the counter as Luke hung back at their table waiting quietly as she plated up the order. 

That was one thing about Ashton being used to dating girls that was nice; he always paid wherever they went now. Luke thought maybe it was partially the only ever dating girls thing coupled with guilt. About what exactly, he wasn't sure, but after three months of this, he was sure some of Ashton's actions were more motivated out of some type of guilt than normal 'relationship' convention. 

Calum and Michael were still oblivious, but Luke and Cal were on much better terms, things were practically back to normal. Which was obviously awful because now Luke felt guilty all the time; he was constantly lying about why he would be busy or who he was seeing. And Ashton hadn't gotten any better when it came to hickeys; there were at least three visible at all times. As soon as they started to fade, then they would be replaced like clockwork. 

And he didn't really mind anymore, none of it really bothered him, minus the lying to Calum. The routine and the secrecy didn't really make much of a difference. And they were that 'busy' together Luke doubted that the older boy had time to shag anyone else. Not that he was really worried about sharing or anything he just liked to know what his STI odds were like. 

The best thing was though, they still hung out like friends, like right now, getting brownies. They'd been talking about coming here for weeks, on recommendations from friends, the brownies were expensive though so they'd wanted to sit down properly and eat them with coffee, so it had taken them a little while to find the time to do it, but they were finally here. 

"Okay so, I only got two, cause I'm not really that hungry, but they smell so good I think I'm gonna buy more when we leave," Ash told him as he joined him at the table. 

He hummed in response and reached across grabbing one of the brownies off the plate, it was coated in icing sugar, a rich chocolate smell engulfed his nostrils and at the very end a tinge of mint. He took a tentative bite placing it back on the plate. At first, he thought his nostrils had deceived him, and then the mint flavour finally found it's way through and a small moan left his lips.

He heard a groan leave Ashton and he looked up to see the other boy had the other brownie held in mid-air (a large bite missing) with his eyes closed. They were good brownies. Luke placed his middle finger and his thumb on the brownie the older boy was holding gently pulling it until he let go and flicked his eyes open. Luke pointed to the mint flavoured one on the plate with his eyes before taking a bite out of the one he'd taken from Ashton. He had much the same reaction as the other. 

"These are so good, like what the fuck," he declared. 

Ashton chuckled, finishing the last of the mint brownie, "I definitely wanna get more before we leave,"

Luke nodded and opened his mouth to speak, before seeing a waitress had appeared with their coffees, he sighed, "They didn't even last long enough for us to enjoy them with our drinks," 

"It's more common than you'd think," the girl said with a chuckled before disappearing again. 

"As I said, we'll get more before we leave," Ashton said knowingly before taking a sip from his mug, "Ugh, that's yours," he grabbed the mug from Luke's hand, swapping them before taking a sip and this time letting a small smile find it's way onto his face. 

Luke didn't care about his coffee like Ashton did, as long as there was milk in it he was happy, the older boy, however, could be a bit pedantic. 

"Michael said he was going to introduce you to Crystal this week; I could have sworn you'd already met," 

"Yeah we kind of did, but she and I were both pretty drunk, so like I have no idea what we talked about, but apparently it was for like twenty minutes," 

"Was that the night I had to meet you at the train station and order you an Uber?" Luke asked chuckling, Ashton just nodded solemnly, "and I couldn't get you in the uber because you kept trying to grab my dick, and then you invited yourself back to my place," 

"Luke, what the fuck don't say stuff like that," Ashton huffed taking a long sip of his coffee. 

"Sorry I didn't think about how other people might take it," 

Ashton hummed and looked around the mostly empty brownie store before his shoulders visibly relaxed. They chatted idly about Crystal and Michael as they sipped at their drinks. After he'd finished his drink, Ashton got up and got a box of the expensive little brownies. He took a chocolate one and a caramel one out of the box before tying the others back up safely. It took all of Luke's self-control to not just snatch a hand across the table and steal the chocolate one out from underneath him. Instead, they shared them again, the caramel was nice, but the double chocolate was still his favourite, Ashton agreed with him grinning as Luke made some comment about wanting to have sex with the brownie. 

That relaxed him a little. The older boy had been quieter since Luke's comment about him trying to grab his dick and honestly by now, Luke should have known better. He was used to being able to make offhand comments, whether they were true or not (this one was) about his friends having sex with him. 

"I need to go wash my face before we leave," he said, getting up to head in the direction of the bathroom. 

"Me too, I'll come," Ashton said, standing to join him on the short journey to the bathroom. 

They made their way to the men's room, he was thinking very hard about the box of brownies Ashton had left on the table along with his backpack. As soon as they got back to his place, he was cracking that box open and hiding at least two brownies in his fridge; he thought as he opened the bathroom door. 

Ashton closed the door behind himself and Luke heard a lock slide into place, he actually looked around the room properly and noticed it was a self-contained bathroom, one sink, one toilet. If he was going to be in the bathroom while the older boy peed then maybe this, thing was getting a little too chummy. 

He distracted himself by looking over his appearance in the mirror, he had icing sugar on his top lip, and Ashton hadn't bothered to say anything, typical. He brought a finger to his mouth, wiping off a small section of the wite coating before the other's hand caught his wrist. Luke turned his head to where Ashton was standing behind him an eyebrow poised to be quirked when he saw the look in his eyes. They burned with intensity as he brought the finger to his lips and let the tip dip into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it, making sure all the icing sugar was gone before pulling off. Luke's jaw was on the floor; Ashton's timing was getting worse and worse. They had two perfectly good apartments they could be doing this in but no, he was going to tease him in a public bathroom. The older boy took the moment of surprise to lean in and run his tongue along Luke's top lip. 

As he moved to pull back, the younger boy chased his lips catching them in a chaste kiss before Ashton pulled back again. If things were going to keep on like this, Luke was going to go insane. The thought of his cock in the other boy's mouth was enough to get him semi-hard in his jeans. Ashton had never offered to or even seemed to think about putting his lips anywhere near Luke's dick. There was still hope, he silently told himself. 

Ashton seemed to realise that he'd started something and started kissing and sucking on Luke's neck. He walked him back toward the counter until Luke's bum hit it, one of his hands slid underneath Luke's knee and the other to his waist, giving him the momentum to sit up on the counter comfortably. The taller boys hands were holding himself up as the other continued to press into his neck and jaw. His pants were growing tighter, and he decided that if Ashton wasn't going to get the ball going, he'd have to. He reached a hand down to the crotch of his trousers and gave Ash's cock a few experimental rubs before unbuttoning the pants and snaking a hand inside. His lips left Luke's neck to let out a gasp at the contact. Luke chuckled, bringing the hand up to his mouth and spitting as liberally as he could in his palm before replacing it and continuing to work him. 

He could apparently only stand this for a few minutes before he was pulling back, tugging Luke down off the counter and using his hand to guide Luke down toward his cock, which Luke took into his mouth deeply. Ashton's hips aided him, and Luke's bobbing became almost unnecessary as the older boy built to his climax. His hand wove into Luke's hair, helping to guide himself in and out of the hot mouth, over and over. 

"I'm gonna cum," he let out with a groan his hips speeding up slightly, "can't leave a mess in here Luke," the younger boy nodded, small tears prickling the corners of his eyes as the full length grazed the back of his throat ever so slightly with each thrust. 

He unslackened his jaw, creating a tighter seal with his mouth as the thrusting continued evermore sporadic as the other's orgasm built, before Ashton abruptly stopped, his knees buckling slightly as he came in Luke's mouth, he only held his cock there a few moments feeling Luke suck the sensitive head ensuring it was clean before pulling out. He watched as the younger boy swallowed and let his tongue dart out to wet his bottom lip. 

As Ashton returned his dick to its rightful place in his underwear, the other stood and dusted his knees, needlessly. Luke knew he looked good, not in the conventional sense but in the 'he looks totally fucked out, and it's because of me,' good. He was waiting for Ashton to make eye contact with him, readying his smirk. When he did finally meet his eyes, Luke's mind faltered for a moment as he watched Ashton's eyes search his face before a finger gently wiped his top lip. The finger waited in front of his lips, and he opened his mouth and sucked it clean. Cum. Then the finger was gone, and Ashton had turned leaving the bathroom. 

And Luke had thought he was going to get a kiss. 


	14. Chapter 14

"Why are we getting coffee if we're just gonna go drinking anyway?"

"I'm so fucking tired, and also this place's coffee is so good, when I realised we were close I couldn't help myself," Luke sighed before adding, "and you know how I feel about coffee,"

"Lukewarm," Ashton supplied almost immediately.

Luke looked back at the boy following him and narrowed his eyes in a squinted glare, "ha, ha, ha you fucking comedian, you,"

Ashton didn't break his grin, so instead, the younger boy turned back and continued leading them up the small incline toward the coffee shop. Moments like this annoyed Luke, because the niggling (Read: Silly little girl) part of his brain wanted to giggle at how funny and charming Ashton could be. The rest of him, however, was well aware he could be an arse when he felt like it.

When they got to the coffee shop Luke ordered for them. Taking Ashton's role of pretentious coffee connoisseur, he ordered the others coffee exactly how he liked it and got a little creative with his own adding a few pumps of flavoured syrup and putting it on ice for a change. 

They were already running late to meet the other two, so Luke ordered them an uber, the older boy was grumbling about, time-management and 'the polite thing to do' when they finally got in the uber, and he took a sip of the coffee Luke had ordered him, and his eyes lit up. 

"Okay, you're right this is good enough to constitute drinking coffee at five o'clock in the afternoon, I'll give you that," 

Luke could feel an 'I told you so' bubbling up but overcame it knowing full well he'd better not push his luck with him because they had a whole evening together with their friends. When they arrived, Ashton chugged the rest of his coffee before telling Luke to wait outside for a bit before coming in and then he disappeared inside. 

Luke couldn't help but roll his eyes at the others receding back. It didn't bother him all that much; it was more the fact that Ashton really thought people would think they were fucking just because they arrived together. Platonic friendship seemed to be a forgotten concept to him. So instead he leisurely sipped his coffee, seeing no reason to waste any of it. Maybe he was taking his time a little bit spitefully, but the coffee was nice so the time felt well spent nonetheless. 

He replied to a few texts, checked Instagram, twitter and even indulged in his guilty pleasure... tiktok before finally throwing out his cup, and it's heavily soggy and chewed on cardboard straw. Heading upstairs to where Calum had said they were meeting and searched over the heads of the few clusters of people strewn around the place to find Michael, Calum and Ashton sitting at a table right next to the edge of the balcony. He took a deep breath and headed in their direction, already planning to take the seat between Michael and Cal rather than the one between Ashton and Cal. Maybe he was overthinking things a bit, was Ashton getting in his head? No, he just didn't feel like putting up with him right now.

Calum, who had his back to the balcony, saw Luke first and gave him a massive grin and wave to attract his attention as if they weren't already making eye contact. He gave his small smile and an embarrassed sigh before taking his pre-selected place between him and Michael, who gave him a gentle slap on the back in greeting. 

"You're so late," Michael told him. 

"Yeah I went past this coffee place, Cal you know the one, and I had to go in and get a coffee they're just way too good not to," he said with a shrug. 

He looked up and smiled at Ash as if in greeting, "Oh yeah, you took me there like once and now whenever I'm nearby I _have_ to go, entirely understandable," 

Ashton rolled his eyes and seemed as though he was going to comment before Michael interjected, "You've never taken me there? Don't you love me?"

Luke chuckled, "I'll take you next week sometime, I didn't think you liked coffee that much though," 

"I don't; I just don't like being left out, which you two don't seem to care about. It's always 'Calum and I this, Calum and I that,'" he said changing his tone to mock Luke. 

"Do I need to tell Crystal you're in love with me? Or do you say shit like this in front of her too?" Luke laughed. Michael rolled his eyes and grinned. Luke looked around the table, "oh, I need a drink, now I feel left out," he said, moving to stand up. 

"I was gonna go up anyway, what do you want?" Cal asked, standing faster. 

"Leave him to feel left out," 

He shot a faux angry look at Michael, "I'll have a Japanese Slipper if my sugar daddy's buying," he turned at the end to bat his eyelashes at Calum. 

"Your sugar daddy needs a sugar daddy," he sighed before heading back inside toward the bar. 

The three of them chuckled, the boys each taking a sip from their drinks and Luke stealing Calum's glass taking a swig of the lager before screwing his face up. 

"Don't drink much beer?" Ashton asked as he watched him put the glass back.

"Nah just more of a pale ale kind of person," Luke said with a shrug, it was weird doing this with Ashton, any information he gave him both felt too personal and well overdue. 

"I remember when all you'd drink was lager, you've grown," Michael added chuckling. 

When Calum returned, Luke sipped away at his cocktail until Michael got the next round and he had another, and then it was Ashton's round, and he had another. It wouldn't have been more than an hour and a half, and he was well on his way to tipsy. Sending Ashton up to the bar with his card for their fourth round. 

"I'm surprised you're not on a sugar rush, there's so much midori in those drinks," Calum chuckled as he watched Luke. The younger boy was turned awkwardly in his seat with his head resting on the back of the chair, watching Ashton and Michael head toward the bar. "You still got a bit of a thing for him, hey?" 

Luke whipped himself around quickly, "no," but the alcohol betrayed him, and he turned a deep red in his cheeks. 

Calum raised his eyebrows, and he sighed. Letting his head fall into his hands, "come here," Luke looked up and saw Calum making a 'come here' gesture with his hand and the much bigger boy stood up and climbed onto his lap. "I am really sorry," A sob left Luke's lips and he embarrassedly buried his head in Calum's neck, "oh wow, I didn't realise it was this bad, you want me to take you home?"

"No it's fine, I'll be fine," he pulled back wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, "just so used to not talking about it, it made me feel really stupid, I'm not upset, just embarrassed," he admitted, he paused for a moment thinking, "You know if we just got married I wouldn't have to worry about dating? I would make a really good wife cal, I promise," he told him earnestly.

Calum started chuckling, "I'm sure you'd make me a great wife, "

"What are you two giggling about?" Michael's voice asked, they turned and looked up seeing the other's had reappeared with the drinks. 

"Luke's gonna be my wife," Calum giggled before leaning over and peppering Luke's cheek with kisses before sneakily blowing a raspberry on his neck. The taller boy was laughing uncontrollably when Calum started sucking a hickey onto his neck, and Luke began to giggle harder. 

"Stop! Cal that's so gross!" Luke attempted to push himself up off the chair, but Calum's arms snaked around him, keeping him on his lap. 

"Oh come on you let that loser your sleeping with leave them all over you, you're gonna be my wife I gotta mark my territory," 

Luke blushed a deep shade of red knowing Ashton was watching them, "shut up," he muttered. 

"You're normally so much more talkative about your sex life, what's gotten into you?" Michael asked, pushing their drinks toward them. 

"He likes weird stuff, doesn't he? What is it? Panties? Latex? Toes?" Calum asked, pulling his head back so he could look at the younger boy straight on. 

"Butt plugs? Are you wearing one right now? Oh my god, he's wearing one right now," Michael declared.

"Leave him alone you two, he'd probably just trying to respect their privacy," Ashton told them, offering a stern look.

"We'll drop it," Calum stated and paused for a moment before awkwardly changing the subject. "So is anyone going to the Parramatta vs. Rabbitohs game? Cause I have a spare ticket if one of you wanna come," 

Luke and Ashton only stayed for another hour or so before Luke told everyone he was tired and wanted to head home. Calum asked if he wanted him to take him home and then Michael offered as well until finally, Ashton said that he was meant to go see a girl who lived near Luke's anyway and that he'd go with him. Luke had tried to remind them all that he was perfectly capable of taking himself home, but no one was listening. 

The pair chatted aimlessly as they caught an Uber to Luke's. He knew that as soon as they crossed the threshold though, Ashton's attitude would change. Why else would he be coming home with him?

He was right, as soon as the apartment door was closed Ashton's hands were pulling up the hem of the taller boys shirt, getting up onto his tiptoes to get the shirt over his head. His lips attaching themselves to Luke's neck on the opposite side of the hickey Calum had left. Luke's knees buckled slightly, the older boys lips sent a different feeling through him than Cal's ever could, kind of like a jolt of electricity at first contact and then a warm set of nerves pulsing through him after. It definitely didn't support his internal insistence that he didn't have feelings for Ashton. He involuntarily let his head fall back against the closed door and then the other pressed him the rest of the way up against it, his hand kneading Luke's cock through his jeans. 

Things progressed as they usually did, feverish hands touching, pulling, rubbing. Mouths searching for contact and finding none. Until they both came in a mess of 'of fucks' and moans in Luke's bed. 

"I hope Calum sees that big hickey that 'loser' your fucking left on you," Ashton chuckled rolling onto his side to look at Luke who lay on his back next to him. 

He jolted up, scrambling from under the thin top sheet to his bathroom, "you fucking asshole, this is huge, this is the biggest hickey I've ever seen, it looks so gross," he cried. 

Ashton's laughter sounded from the other room, and Luke sighed, of course, he thought it was funny, "I'll loan you a scarf or a turtle neck," he called. 

The taller boy rolled his eyes before returning to his bedroom and flopping down beside Ashton once again, "you're the worst, you know that right?"

"Shhh just go to sleep," 

He let his eyes close as he was told, trying to clear his mind, one deep breath after another until his senses started to dull and entered the strange realm between sleep and awake. He felt a soft pair of lips on his forehead and then the bed shifted, and he woke slightly, his eyes opening slightly to see Ashton's back now facing him. He rolled over to face away from him and let his eyes close, ready to drift off again.


	15. Chapter 15

"I feel like we haven't hung out just the two of us in ages," Michael sighed sipping his coffee, "you're right by the way, this place has the best coffee," 

"Yeah, well you know what it's like when everyone gets busy with work and boning tinder guys. Somehow I still can't manage to shake Calum's meddlesome self though,"

He gave the other yikes look before admitting, "yeah he told me what happened with the whole setup thing," 

"Yeah, he can be a fucking dickhead sometimes," 

"Well, Ashton was telling me - and you didn't hear this from me - that Ashton said his ex-girlfriend called him and wanted to go to dinner, something about wanting to get back together. Thought I might mention it cause Calum said something cryptic like 'guess Luke was right', thought maybe you guys had a bet going or something," 

"No I'm just a smarter than Calum, and apparently my gaydar is better too," 

"Hmmm sounds like Cal, at least he has good intentions," Michael shrugged and took a sip of his coffee. 

Luke hadn't been that focused on the rest of the afternoon's activities. He'd been mulling over his new information. He and Ashton had never set down terms for this thing of theirs, but they were friends, he'd tell him if he was getting back together with Emma, he was a good guy. 

They were catching up tonight, so if it were true he'd tell him, the more likely scenario was he'd said it in an attempt to cover up something that didn't need to be covered up. So by the time Ashton arrived that night, Luke wasn't even thinking about it anymore. 

"Hey, I brought a couple of bottles of wine cause we always end up here, drinking all yours," Ash announced as he entered through the unlocked front door. 

Luke jumped slightly at the noise, "Oh, hey, thanks, what'd you bring?" 

"A sauv and a cabernet, I think I got the cabernet you normally drink, but the sauv was a total guess, it had the nicest label," He held the bottles up when Luke looked up at him. 

"Oh cool doesn't really bother me, it's all alcohol, can you open the red? I'm just getting dinner ready," 

Ashton hummed, and Luke returned to his cooking, hearing the other boy opening the cupboard behind him. He plated up two servings of mushroom gnocchi, generously sprinkling them with parmesan before making a show of kissing his fingers like a stereotypical chef. He grinned, turning to look at Ashton, who just rolled his eyes fondly. 

"Dinner is ready, and I'm freakin' keen to eat, I'm starving," 

"Haven't you eaten today?" Ashton asked motheringly. 

"I didn't have anything when Michael and I got coffee this afternoon cause I didn't want to ruin my appetite for this," 

"It does look and smell amazing, so that;'s understandable, come on let's eat it before you waste away," he tilted his head toward the lounge room directing Luke, before taking his place (yes he had a place) on the left-hand side of the couch. 

They sat themselves up with their plates and glasses on the coffee table, their arses firmly on the couch and cruel intentions playing on the tv. They chatted through the movie, mostly comments about Sarah Michelle Gellar and her filmography. 

"I love the fact that she and Freddy Prince Jr are married like Fred and Daphne are together in real life, so wholesome," Luke gushed as he sat back down, having just tidied away their plates and glasses. 

"Yeah pretty cute, would have been cuter if Daphne and Velma had got together," Ashton said a sly smile on his face. 

"Typical," Luke said with an eye roll. 

"Didn't take you for a homophobe Lucas," Ashton said, shaking his head and tutting. 

"And I should have guessed you were a total perv," 

"You know I am Luke," Ashton smiled coyly climbing across onto Luke's lap, the taller boy sinking back into the corner of the couch to get comfortable. "You know, I look forward to Wednesday nights, everything you cook is so good, which is even more impressive when you think that most of the time it's your first time making it," Ashton told him matter-of-factly.

"Oh yeah it's my cooking that gets you here, nothing else," Luke said, rolling his eyes to fight the blush. 

"Okay, maybe there are other factors," he conceded a small smirk finding its way onto his lips before they pressed forward and connected with the younger boys. 

Luke pressed back into him instinctively letting his mouth open, Ashton reciprocated their tongues meeting, the taste of wine still lingered in his mouth. Luke tried his hardest to savour the moment, sure Ashton would pull away any minute. Instead, his hand came up to hold the side of his neck, his thumb brushing against Luke's earlobe, the subtle touch causing him to imagine it was his cheek he was holding instead. 

The kisses were slow and deliberate, the older boy pressing himself up toward Luke's mouth rather than a downward grind on his cock. The tender kisses lasted longer than Luke could have dreamt until he could feel Ashton's cock growing harder pressed against his abdomen. He was still pushing into him, but his kisses grew feverish, leaving the other's lips and finding his neck. His hips grinding his cock into Luke's stomach. It seemed to all get the better of him though as he pulled back, reaching down to undo it button and zipper, taking his own cock in his hand, the older supporting himself as he sat on his knees. 

Luke watched in awe as Ashton's eyes fluttered shut and small moans started to leave his mouth. He let his hand find the older boys waist, running down Ashton's thigh and back up, over and over, admiring his strong legs. 

Whines were now leaving the boy atop him, and Luke couldn't wait any longer. Seeing Ashton like this was entirely new, but the tightening in his jeans wasn't. He pushed the older boy back onto the couch without resistance and positioned his knees either side of the other. He reached over and took the bottle of lube and box of condoms that now lived in his coffee table drawer out. 

He could feel his eyes on him as he poured a generous amount on his hand before working, the older boys cock slowly, letting him build a little and then taking it into his mouth, sucking just as slowly.

"You're being such a prick today," he groaned. 

Luke hummed around his cock, and Ashton let out a drawn-out moan. He continued bobbing and swirling his tongue slowly taking the rare chance to tease Ashton. The longer he kept it up, the less it felt like he was teasing Ashton and more like he was teasing himself. 

He pulled off, climbing over Ashton's legs to stand, unbuttoning and pulling down his jeans and underwear. Giving his own cock a few strokes, providing the slightest bit of relief. Ashton sat up leaning on his elbows to watch as Luke slid a condom and lube onto his cock before climbing back on top of the older boys legs, he shuffled forward onto Ashton's hips before sitting up, using one hand to support himself and the other to guide the cock inside him. 

"You haven't even opened yourself up," 

"I do still masturbate you know?" 

Luke lowered himself onto Ashton's cock, as he came down flush on the other's hips, he admitted to himself that maybe he could have done with a little opening up. But Ashton was being so tender and soft and pliable that it was driving Luke insane. His eyes fluttered shut as he began to ride up and down leaning forward slightly to try and find his prostate, low moans started to leave his mouth. His hands were on either side of Ashton's head as he worked himself on his cock, feeling the heat and the breath of the other beneath him when his eyes snapped open and he gasped, he'd found his prostate. He stopped his movements though when he saw Ashton's face and realised the other hadn't even been moving his hips. 

"Are you not enjoying this?" 

"No, uh not really sorry," 

"That's okay, you just have to tell me and we can change positions," he pulled himself off Ashton and tried to think what the older boy would prefer. He climbed off the couch and pushed the few bits and pieces on the coffee table off to the side before laying himself across the tabletop. His hips just on the edge and his chest pressed firmly against the solid table, his hands already holding the edge, bracing himself.

It only took a few moments and a bit of shuffling around and then Ashton was inside him again, this time thrusting hard and fast. Slamming in and out of his tight arse over and over, like an entirely different man than that of a few moments ago. Moans and groans leaving his mouth and when he eventually hit Luke's prostate, high pitched whines joined the panting and moaning in the otherwise empty room. 

Luke could feel them both building, climbing closer and closer, his euphoric, barely touched, prostate fueled orgasm so close but Ashton's voice sounded first, low, just louder than being under his breath. 

"Oh fuck, baby, yeah Emma," 

He either didn't hear himself or didn't think Luke had heard because in the few short moments Luke had been frozen in horrified confusion Ashton had cum. Still, in his somewhat dazed state, he slowly reached a hand back and pushed on Ashton's chest, a sign for him to pull out. 

When he did his voice sounded confused, "You haven't cum yet, is this some sort of kinky orgasm denial?"

A loud sob wracked through Luke seemingly out of nowhere, "You're getting back together with her? Aren't you?" the tears could be heard in his voice. When Ashton didn't reply he spoke again, his voice slightly more composed, "Were you going to tell me?" He took the silence he received as an omission of guilt and continued, "it's one thing to call out her name when you're heartbroken and trying to get over her. But now? When she's practically your girlfriend again when you should be ending this fucked up thing with me, what the fuck is wrong with you?" his voice forceful before reining himself back in, "I wasn't under any illusion that this was fucking special to you but I thought we were friends, I thought we respected each other, apparently not." 

It was silent in the room for a long moment. 

"I was gonna tell you," 

"Well, you didn't," Luke said with a frustrated shrug of his shoulders his face a mask of disgust, "Get the fuck out of my house." 


	16. Chapter 16

Luke was curled up on the couch watching Forensic Files and pretending he wasn't dreading going back to work in the next few days. He'd taken a couple of sick days to stay home and feel sorry for himself, but he couldn't afford any more time off after this. At first, he'd started on housework, the dishes, two loads of laundry, cleaning out the fridge, changing his sheets, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, mopping, you name it, he'd done it.

So now he was back to binging true crime and drinking rose alone. He'd thrown the bottle of sauv Ashton had brought in the bin out of spitefulness. The worst part was he couldn't even articulate why he was so angry, it was so many things, but overall, he was tired, relieved, but still tired. He guessed he just hadn't realised how all those months practically back in the closet had affected him.

He brought his wandering mind back to the television show in front of him, but for the next few hours, invasive thoughts kept drawing it away. Were Emma and Ashton back together now? Had Ashton ever told anyone what was going on between them? Did he miss him? Did he miss their friendship?

Each thought broke him from his show, and each time he'd snap himself back and try and follow the narrative again. He didn't really understand much of what was going on the show, and he was starting to get fidgety. So when there was a knock at the door, he jumped up almost immediately, his hand already turning the doorknob before realising he had no idea who was on the other side. His heart was racing; when he finally pulled back the door, Michael.

He sighed and moved out of the frame, pulling the door all the way back to let the other in.

"Ashton said I should come over and check on you, didn't say why. I'm assuming you two aren't talking for some reason, which is just dumb because you're such good friends. But that doesn't matter; you look like shit,"

A sob came from Luke, and he turned his back to Michael moving straight back to his blanket on the couch.

"I-" Michael started.

"Don't worry; it's too much to explain,"

"It wouldn't be too much to explain to Calum, would it? Do you want me to call him?"

He nodded, and Michael closed the door, moving to sit on the edge of the couch. Luke burrowed further into his blanket, keeping his legs curled so as not to bump the other, Michael rested a gentle hand on his knee. The only reassurance he could give with his words seemingly failing him. It was quiet for a moment, awkward quiet because Michael realised that there was something he wasn't privy too, and apparently wasn't going to be anytime soon. Luke almost felt bad for making him feel the outsider, but right now, he wasn't in the mood to protect the others feelings.

He pulled his phone out and dialled, "I'm at Luke's, yeah, Ashton sent me over to check on him, I don't know why he asked me and not you, yeah I'll stay till you get here,"

"I'm not an invalid, I can be left alone until Calum comes," Luke said stroppily wiping his face with the back of his hand.

"It looks like you've had most of that bottle of wine,"

"So?"

"So, I think you might be a bit tipsy, and you're upset. I'm your friend, even if you don't wanna tell me what the problem is I'm gonna stay here until I know you're okay,"

Again there was a long pause, "Thank you, I'm sorry,"

"It's okay,"

Then they sat in silence for the next half hour on the couch lazily watching the show until Calum arrived, Michael whispered something in his ear, and then he was gone, and Calum replaced him on the couch. There was silence, but it wasn't awkward.

"When did you last shower?"

"I don't know, Saturday night I guess,"

"C' mon then," Calum stood and beckoned him with his fingers, and he got up and followed. He led him to the bathroom and stopped, "come on, kit off,"

Luke sighed, sliding his shorts and underwear down, and then his shirt over his head. Calum was already adjusting the water temperature when he stepped past him and climbed in, letting the water wash straight over his face and hair.

"Wash your hair,"

"Can't be bothered,"

"You're so moody when you're tipsy," He groaned, pulling his own clothes off and climbing in behind Luke, "pass me the shampoo," Luke extended his arm backward handing the bottle to him and Calum started to shampoo his hair, "so did you tell him?"

"No, it's way more complicated than that," he paused, waiting for Calum to ask him more, but the other just kept massaging the shampoo into his scalp. "About a week after I found out that you'd lied to me, we ran into Emma at a thrift store with some other guy, Ashton was upset, I brought him here, tried to make him laugh, make him feel better, and then he kissed me." Luke paused his voice becoming weaker with embarrassment, "I kissed him back, which I know was stupid but he wanted me, and I wanted him and fuck,"

"You let it go further, didn't you?"

"Yeah," he said quietly, "yeah we had sex, and then he called out her name, and I was kind of hurt, but I wasn't that surprised and, I-, "

"You kept letting it happen; he's the one you've been sleeping with?" Luke nodded, Calum might not have been able to tell from behind except his fingers were working on rinsing the shampoo from the taller boys hair, and he could feel the up and down motion. "What changed then? Are you in love with him?"

"On Saturday, he did it again; he called out her name right after Michael had told me they were getting back together. I realised he wasn't a very good person if he could do that to both of us,"

"So you're moping around your apartment because Ashton's a bad person?" he asked knowingly.

"I already told you I still had a thing for him, and it was just getting worse. I'm not stupid, okay!" Luke snapped, turning to face Calum who flinched back, "I knew he wasn't going to fall in love with me. I just thought he gave a shit about me. You don't treat your friends like that; you don't treat people like that,"


	17. Chapter 17

He hadn't seen Ashton in months. They had slipped out of one another's lives as if they'd been nothing more than acquaintances. The world kept turning, and they both kept hanging out with Michael and Calum. No one had gotten custody of the friends in the divorce. Luke often thought that if anyone were to get custody it ought to be him.

This was mostly promoted by the fact that he was a little lonely. He'd admit to that, he hadn't realised how much of his time had been spent with Ashton of late. So now there were expanses of time he didn't know what to do with, the painting class, for instance, was now an empty hour a week he didn't know what to do with. The more he let himself realise things like this the more the realisation nagged that this is what breakups felt like. Did this feel like a break up to Ashton too? Maybe not, he had another person to fill the Luke shaped spaces in his life.

He supposed as well the fact that he was so used to having someone else making plans and inviting themselves everywhere with him, had made him lazy when it came to making plans and being a good friend. So he called Michael.

"Hey man,"

"Hey dude, how's it going?"

"Yeah, no, good, I was wondering if you were free to catch up this afternoon?"

"Actually Calum and I are dealing with, with Ashton shit right now, sorry, we really can't,"

"Oh, yeah no I get it, you don't need my help do you?"

"No, I think that'd just be too much right now"

"Good, okay I'll talk to you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll call you,"

"Okay, love you, bye,"

"Love you too,"

His mind raced to a hundred different possibilities,   
QLuke had realised after that that he really had no idea what was going on in Ashton's life. Any assumptions he made were just that, assumptions. The curiosity was killing him though, it shouldn't have, every part of him new that his curiosity was the same as admitting he still had feelings for him. That didn't stop him from asking a week later.

"So what was the Ashton crisis about?", Calum and Michael shared a look between themselves, "Oh okay, I see how it is,"

"You of all people know we've learnt not to meddle," Calum told him solemnly, Luke rolled his eyes taking a sip from his mug, "we don't tell him about you when he asks,"

It took all of his strength not whip his head around, _'he asks about me?'_


	18. Chapter 18

The first time there were flowers, the wax kind wrapped in butchers paper and left across the doorstep like a memorial for a person lost.

They couldn't be from Ashton.

The second time there were brownies, a box of a dozen of them. They must have cost a small fortune because they were the best kind, they were _the_ brownies.

He'd spoken to loads of people about those brownies, surely it wasn't Ashton.

The third time there was a massive bag of coffee grounds that there was no way he was going to get through them before they were ruined. They too were the good kind, the best kind.

There were plenty of people who knew Luke loved that coffee shop and their grounds.

The fourth time there was a ring box left hidden between the potted plants by his front door, he'd only it found when he was watering them that night.

No one else could have left this, no one else even knew he'd seen that ring.

The last time though there was just a letter, and his mind went straight to _'how the fuck is he going to Dear John me if we already have no relationship'_.  
  
  


_Dear Luke,_

_I bet you're wondering why you're getting this letter and the things I've sent._

_1\. It's not Dear John (stop watching so many romance films)_

_2\. I'm not trying to buy you or your forgiveness, I just want you to know I did pay attention, you were my friend even if my actions didn't show that_

_I'm so fucking sorry, I genuinely am. I don't have any excuses or pretty reasons I just couldn't deal with the reality of what was going on. I was living as a person who didn't exist anymore. I still don't know who I am really, but I know that I care about you a lot and I miss you. I know what I did was terrible, but I want you to know it wasn't out of a place of malice, I never wanted to be cruel to you. I admit though that I wasn't thinking about you, and how my actions would affect you, I was thinking about myself and trying to be the person I was before Emma dumped me, before I met you. I miss you though, and I miss us, we had a lot of fun. So I'm asking you to give me a chance, come by my place if you want to try and make this work. I'll wait, and if you _ _don't come _ _I'll understand. _   
  
  


_I think I might love you,_

_Ashton_

_p.s I know this is dramatic, but you know me by now and that's the only way I do things._


	19. Chapter 19

"You made some pretty big claims in that letter you left," Luke said solemnly, not lifting his eyes from where he'd fixed them at the older boys knees.

He'd come to Ashton's just as he'd asked him to. The lanky boy knew he was ready to try he just wasn't quite sure if Ashton could be trusted to follow through.

"I don't like that you're calling them claims," Ashton said, Luke, raised his head to meet the eyes of the other. A sense of embarrassment was building in him, being here meant that he was putting his feelings out there. He'd really thought when Calum had suggested this gorgeous boy to him that it would be easier than this. Honestly, fuck Calum.

"Well you have to be realistic," he paused, "things haven't been easy,"

"No, but good things rarely are," Ashton told him a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

Luke sighed, "that's what sad straight people say when they cheat on each other,"

He chuckled, "okay, that's a fair comment. You know what I mean though, this is a big step for me and it hasn't come easy but I'm doing it for you, for us, because I think this is worth it and it's hard for me, I'm not going to lie about that."

"I'm torn between being ecstatic that you're willing to try and exhausted because you keep saying it's hard because I don't want to feel like work," Luke sighed again and this time so did Ashton, so he moved past the shorter man not sparing a glance as he let himself into the somewhat well-known kitchen and poured a glass of water. Ashton followed him taking a seat and watching, he seemed as if he had something to say but remained quiet with his brows furrowed deeply. "I'm not trying to be difficult, really. I just want you to remember that I am another human being over here, I need things too and I don't want this to become about you and how hard this is for you all the time and stop being about me and us," Luke continued before sitting himself up on the kitchen counter and sipping at his glass.

"I get that, I get that," he responded low under his breath, his brow still furrowed. "I don't wanna take that away from you, but I do want to warn you that I am going to be work, and I'm scared," he admitted, "I'm scared," he repeated to himself.

"Fuck, me too. Is that a bad sign?" Luke asked rubbing his palm against his forehead.

Ashton reached across and picked up the offending hand holding it in his own, "I honestly don't know but I am really excited at the thought of being with you,"

"I am too," Luke let out a relieved sigh and smiled warmly at the beautiful creature opposite him before continuing, "I think we just need to figure out how this is going to work because that's what's making me most nervous," he paused knowing his next question could start an argument, "are we going to tell the others?"

He could feel the older man's hand tense slightly, "I don't know if I'm ready for them to judge us, I feel like they already aren't super impressed with me at the moment, maybe we work up to that,"

Luke held back a sigh, "They're not going to judge you, they'll be happy for us. But I get it, baby steps. What about us, how are we going to work? If we aren't telling people,"

"Dating? I guess just yeah, dating. Not telling anyone but maybe you could have a key for here and I could have a key to your place, catch up as often as we can and, and we can work up to more. I promise you that we'll work up to telling everyone and anyone who'll listen," Ashton grinned, slotting himself between the taller boys legs.

Luke returned the smile leaning down so his lips were just an inch from the others, "even the mailman?"

"Especially the mailman," Ashton assured him, smiling.

Luke closed the distance between them smiling into the kiss. This is exactly what he'd been hoping for from the moment this had all started, some reassurance that this would be worth his time. He could find an easy screw in a bar along Oxford street any night of the week. Calum had been right though, as much trouble as the whole thing had been and annoying as he found the omission to make, he was right. Ashton was the person for Luke, even if it was going to be a hard road to treck.

He pulled back from Ashton's lips, "things are going to work out, yeah?"

"Yeah, things are going to work out," Ashton grinned.


	20. Epilogue

Things don't work out. 

Luke blamed himself for a long time because he gave up on Ashton. Calum and Michael as much as they loved Ashton found themselves being proud of Luke's decision even if Luke couldn't be. Things had gone in a never-ending circle with the two of them. 

They had been in a functioning but secret relationship 

Luke had given Ashton time 

Luke had asked Ashton if they could tell people 

Ashton said no 

Luke had given Ashton time 

Luke had asked Ashton if they could tell people 

Ashton said no 

And so on and so forth, until all they did was look over their shoulders and fuck with the blinds drawn in their apartments, yes _apartments_ they couldn't even be 'roommates'. Luke cried a lot more than he would care to admit, and then he would cry more in guilt for being upset. It wasn't Ashton's fault that he was scared of the world they lived in, scared of the piercing stares, inappropriate jibes from strangers on the street and more importantly the people he cared about. That was where the guilt manifested itself inside Luke, in the part of him that knew what it was like to be scared. It was 18 months before he called it quits with Ashton, and he hadn't made it an ultimatum he'd simply said,

'Ashton, I love you a lot, but you're okay with living in the closet and I'm not and I don't think that's going to change anytime soon,' then he'd taken a long pause and more of the tears that he wasn't supposed to cry streaked down his cheeks and before he could even say anymore Ashton had said, 'so you don't want to be together anymore? Okay, that's fair,' and he'd stood from his spot on the couch calmly and collected his coat and left without another word and Luke was too gobsmacked to say anything so he just watched the older man leave with his mouth slightly ajar. He hadn't seen Ashton for two months after that and he had lived in his guilt every day until he introduced them all (Luke, Michael and Calum) to his new girlfriend, Chantelle. That was when the guilt consumed him, had he sent Ashton ten steps backward?

Michael and Calum reassured him at every turn that he'd done what was best for him, that Ashton wasn't someone he had to (if he was even capable to) 'fix'. They all discussed that maybe this had all been exactly what Ashton was calling it, 'a youthful indiscretion'. Luke privately thought that he wasn't old enough to refer to anything as a 'youthful indiscretion' but remained quiet and satisfied his guilt with the thought that Ashton _seemed_ happy, and Luke doubted they would ever be close enough again for him to truly know if it was more or less than it seemed. 

But then Ashton reached out. He told Luke that he had 'fallen off the bandwagon' and if Luke weren't so ridden with guilt he would have cursed Ashton black and blue for saying anything so thoughtless. But he was so he went to Ashton's apartment which had changed a lot since Luke had last been there, it now housed all of Chantelle's clothes in the places Luke was never allowed to leave anything in case someone _knew_. Luke had argued people would just assume it was Ashton's stuff but the other boy had said, 'you can never be too careful'. 

He told Luke about a boy named Isaiah that he'd met and how they'd been sleeping around behind Chantelle's back and the tall boy had insisted that Ashton break-up with her immediately or tell her the truth. Ashton had sighed and told him that he knew he was going to say that and that he was right. It still took Ashton another month to break up with the girl and Luke personally (and guiltily) thanked the gods that he hadn't ended up spending the rest of his life with this selfish man. 

But then Ashton had dated Isaiah and Luke was to tell no one, but Ashton told Luke everything about his relationship, being that he was his only confidant. It broke Luke again and again as the new boyfriends came and went and Luke still hadn't seen anyone since Ashton, and Ashton blissfully and thoughtlessly moved through (secret) boyfriends happily. 

It was painful but it was tolerable and like Luke had come to expect things only got worse. Well for him, things took a massive upturn for Ashton. He came out, he told everyone and the part that broke Luke's heart was that it was for someone else. It was for Mitchell Collins they'd met at a beginners glass blowing class and had been seeing each other for three weeks. Three. Fucking. Weeks. Calum tried to tell Luke that sometimes when you knew you just _knew_. That didn't reassure him at all, because Luke had fucking _known. _Now there was an ache in his chest that was so much worse than what he'd thought heartbreak was.

_ **The End.** _


End file.
